This Week's Top Ten (Are Stagnant) - August 3, 2013

If you've ever followed this blog for any length of time, you are no doubt used to the lengthy delays between posts. They tend to occur on a monthly basis, and towards the end of the month at that. In that case, you are probably not surprised by my absence. If you began reading my things more recently, however, I do apologize. The frequency of posts for that one week in June must have made you think I was going to become a regular producer of content. Well, I cannot fault you, as that was certainly my plan. Sadly, I made the mistake of hinging my project on the Billboard charts. To be blunt, they could do with some oiling.

The Ke$ha Epiphany

Ke$ha's glittery and gross, ostentatiously trailer trash, and, surprise! I don't hate her.

This Week's Top Ten - June 22, 2013

The new Billboard Hot 100 chart comes out tomorrow, and given what's in the Top 10 right now, I'm a bit anxious to see what will happen. There's some songs that I really want to break in, and definitely others that I'd be happy to see leave. In order for my opinions about tomorrow's results to make sense, these are my thoughts about what's currently leading the charts.

The "We Can't Stop" Music Video

So, I figured I would post a bit of a follow-up to some of the things said in this post, since Miley Cyrus has now posted a video for "We Can't Stop." Here it is.

So, you're still alive after seeing that, right? Of course you are, and good thing, too, because maybe right now you'll feel an ounce of the vicious hate I'm feeling directly after seeing that for the first time. Let's begin.

Dear Miley Cyrus...

Why I Can't Fully Get Behind Emeli Sandé

The short answer is that she's not Kimbra. As for the long answer...

Programming Note

I spent four hours in the car today. It's been a rough weekend, so I wasn't in the best mood to start with, but then about an hour in, I heard "We Can't Stop" by Miley Cyrus. I spent those four minutes morphing from a generically disgruntled driver into this:

Eldest Ch4

Last time, Paolini decided these books should include some of that zesty political flavor that made the Star Wars prequels so beloved.

Eldest Ch1-3

Last time, Star Wars was crossed with fantasy novels to create Eragon. 

Eragon, Briefly

So, when recapping a series, it usually makes sense to cover all of the individual parts. I'm rather inclined to skip over Eragon, though, because it's basically Star Wars. Well, okay. It's Star Wars mixed with the aesthetics of Lord of the Rings, with bonus dragons. I could likely leave it at that, and you wouldn't miss out on anything major. Unfortunately, a closer look reveals that there's just enough "original" stuff going on in Eragon that I would have to backtrack a lot to give context to later recaps. For that reason, I'm kicking this off with a brief recap of the events of Eragon.

Laundry Woes

In which everything is awful.